Sexual fantasies are an idiosyncratic experience of being attracted to sexual activities and objects or wishing to participate in sexual actions. According to some research, men demonstrate more desires in sex than women. In comparison to females, men think about sex more often. They report having more recurrent sex desires and regular feelings of sexual interest. During their lifetime, men rate their sex drive higher than their female age-mates. Males are more absorbed in visual sexual incentives than women. Science has found strict gender role differences and differences in desire over time as described in this paper.
They are likely to spend money on their favorite sexual activities and products such as X-rated movies and visits to prostitutes. Males and females also vary in their frequency of having sex. When heterosexual married couples and dating partners disagree concerning sexual regularity, it is typical of males to require having sex more frequently than females. In a heterosexual couple, actual sexual regularity may reflect the level of interest and attraction between the partners (Low, 1989).
Since time immemorial, men and women have had differences in their sexuality. There have been several explanations why this happens. For instance, the environment in which one is brought up and one’s religious background are considered to play a vital role in sexuality. In my opinion, the environment in which girls and boys are brought up is the major reason why they have different sexual fantasies. A girl is shown how to act in a manner that she will attract men and please them in every situation. Men have been trained to be aggressive, and be the ones doing the seducing. Women have been trained to be alluring, to try and draw men near. Therefore, both genders have different sexual fantasies that are not born but acquired. However, scientists have various views on why there are differences in sexuality between genders. The most convincing explanation is the evolution theory that has been proposed and opposed for many years (Trivers, 1972).
A lot of scholars have handled the question of how men and women differ in sexuality. In their well-documented work, Leitenberg and Henning point out that there are many differences between males and females in terms of sexuality. Leitenberg and Henning describe how men and women evolved leading to differences in their sexuality. The authors provide various examples explaining why men and women cannot have similar sexual fantasies. They highlight the most significant differences between female and male sexuality.
On the other hand, Zurbriggen and Yost from the University of Granada have conducted a research that showed no significant variations between sexual fantasies of women and men. This research showed that both genders have romantic and intimate sexual fantasies concerning their loved ones.
In another research on women’s sexuality conducted at the Northwestern University, the results indicated that women have a bisexual arousal pattern as they are aroused by both female and male erotica. Regan and Rerscheid conducted this study and claimed that there is a difference between male and female sexual fantasies. The authors explained the factors that resulted in the fact that men and women evolved differently and have different sexual fantasies.
In another study carried out at Norwegian University, the authors proved that there are differences in sexual attitudes and desires between men and women. The Norwegian study describes how men evolved psychologically, leading to their different sexual fantasies. When Brown and Sinclair requested young adults to describe their sexual desire, males were more probable than females to emphasize the physical pleasure and sexual interaction. These research results suggest that men’s sexuality differs from that of women, and this originates from differences in evolutionary patterns between the two genders.
Sex Differences According to the Theory of Evolution
In present years, the reasons for variations between male and female sexual fantasies have commonly been explained through the concept of biological and evolution differences between the sexes. With respect to Shackelford and Okami, fundamental arguments of the philosophy of evolution comprise the following points.
1. Women devote more to parentage than men.
This impacts on the selection of a companion and their less readiness to enter into short-term relationships and their less sexual interest and desire to change spouses.
2. Men have fought and contested for women since ancient times much more often than women for men. This has been so because of a large number of societies that have permitted polygamy and men’s physical characteristics their mighty strength and hostility.
3. Due to the fact that women are more devoted to parentage, on average women have been more cautious than men about getting involved in sexual affairs. It has been more important for women as compared to men to get a willing and ready mate. This has resulted in sexual relationships being hurled whenever a woman has substituted her negative approach for a positive attitude.
4. Men are unable to get complete assurance that their offspring are genetically theirs. Therefore, the faithfulness of women has been of paramount importance to men, and any hint of their women’s infidelity typically provokes jealousy in them.
5. Based on the evolutionary approach, appreciating and observing nudity has been more important for males than females. It is natural of men to get aroused by looking at a naked female body; therefore, a lot of them watch pornography to get stimulated. Also, men are supposed to be jealous over the partner’s sexual unfaithfulness, whereas females are presumed to be more jealous over their partner’s emotional unfaithfulness (Brown & Sinclair, 1998).
Numerous researchers have tried to prove that these fundamental evolutionary differences are functional. An American research carried out by Hatfield and Clark elaborated on the important differences between sexual fantasies of women and men and their effect on sexual creativity. It consisted in allocating men the task of requesting female passers-by whether they would like to come with them to their residence and engage in sex (Low, 1989). None of the respondents agreed. However, when females were allocated the same task and asked male passers-by the same question, four in five men were willing and ready to go and engage in sex with the lady. The rest of the men were regretful and explained their refusal by already being in a dedicated and monogamous relationship. None of the female respondents expressed regret or justified their refusal.
Schmidt and Buss’s study presented similar findings (Regan & Rerscheid, 1999). In the study, the men depicted much higher willingness to engage in sex. The reason may not be biological or evolutionary, but it may be men’s sexual patterns or desires that have been acquired during their lifetime (Brown & Sinclair, 1998).
Men have depicted greater desires than females in the sexual diversity. One research shows that, as compared to females, men tend to have four times more sexual partners. Women might have different perspectives than their male counterparts when getting into a temporary relationship. In addition, women are more probable to feel used in a short-term relationship, even though at times they cannot reasonably explain the reason why they feel so. On the other hand, men frequently feel no worries over even a large number of short-term relationships (Leitenberg & Henning, 1996).
Zurbriggen & Yost suggest that most of the differences in sexual fantasies between women and men stem from their life circumstance. The survey was aimed at finding out when women feel the strongest sexual attraction during the period of one year. The magnitude of women’s sexual aspiration vacillates depending on their menstrual cycle. Fluctuation in women’s sexual desires makes them experience sexual interest or preference in men who seem virile. The evolution theory explains different effects that evolution has had on mate choice in women and men. It suggests that men value the mate’s youthful and attractive look (Zurbriggen & Yost, 2004). In America, women have selected partners who earn fifty percent more than the men that were not selected. In many nations, a man who is not financially generous towards his female partner has established grounds for separation (Andersen & Cyranowski, 1992).
According to Brown & Sinclair, when choosing a mate, females exchange their beauty for resources. In his study, Waynforth reports that those women who choose rich husbands have got many children and have fewer chances of divorce, as compared to other women. In fact, women who have rich husbands are more satisfied with their marriage and take care of their husbands and children with no regrets. Therefore, the attractiveness of a woman is as important as a man’s resources (Brown & Sinclair, 1998). Additionally, women prefer less attractive men for long-term relationships provided the man is well-off. On the other hand, men prefer attractive women who have little or no resources. In fact, the most attractive men end up marrying the least attractive women who lacked spouses. This occurs because men do not like unattractive women, and women do not prefer attractive men. As compared to females, men have a permissive attitude towards casual, early sex and extramarital sex intercourse (Andersen & Cyranowski, 1992).
In a study carried out in America, women were given men’s photographs and were asked to select future partners from the photographs. They were more attracted to the wealth of the men rather than their attractiveness. On the other hand, men selected women on the basis of their physical attraction. The women’s dressing was not considered. Therefore, men have a tendency towards visual arousal. According to some research, girls are dressed earlier than boys and taught how to behave in different situations. They dress properly to avoid arousing men at an inappropriate time. However, boys can remain naked until the age of ten since women are not visually aroused (Zurbriggen & Yost, 2004).
In conclusion, sexual similarities and differences between women and men are significant in their sexuality life and relationships. The understanding of the differences is crucial in the accomplishment of sexual satisfaction and enjoyment. Therefore, it is important to investigate gender differences in sexuality and give an explanation for them. Most scholars have come up with an agreement that evolution is the reason behind the differences in sexuality between men and women. Their research, results, and conclusions suggest that men and women evolved differently form a psychological point of view. Therefore, they have different sexual fantasies and attitudes towards sexuality. However, the researched conducted on gender sexuality is controversial. Some researchers such as Zurbriggen and Yost claim that there are no significant differences between genders as far as sexuality is concerned. These results also indicate that an important difference between men and women’s sexuality is based on arousal. However, the researchers do not indicate why women choose one sex if they are capable of being sexually aroused by both sexes.